Over the past several weeks, this has been steadily reducing. Long archived material has had to be retrieved, refreshed and re-loaded. Quite a bit of it turned up at the same time so now, BM feels like it's so crowded in there that finding any detail on demand is tricky. Some stuff just stubbornly refuses to emerge because so many files have suddenly been re-loaded at the same time. The brain is a complex organ, no? It's not like we can buy some more memory, is it? (Don't be fooled by that casual IT reference there, and for pity's sake don't ask me to explain it).
So what's to be done? I could try simply ditching extraneous stuff. BM's version of juggling - but dropping the balls. As in resigning as Chair of the children's centre. What does that tell you about working mums and the Big Society? Also cleaning but at least it's possible to delegate that to someone else, a no-brainer. So far, so small stuff. Space as I said, is limited. The big stuff will have to wait.
Showing posts with label Returning to work. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Returning to work. Show all posts
Tuesday, 4 January 2011
Wednesday, 22 December 2010
Familiar faces
We had a Book Group Christmas get together on Monday evening and it was a really good evening and oddly comforting, in a way I didn't expect. One of the joys of the evening was spending time in the company of familiar friendly faces, which made me realise that I had been missing that aspect of daily life in the routine of journey, work, journey, B husband and children. I miss my friends. Which makes my existence over these 3 weeks or so sound a bit miserable, which it hasn't; just a bit intense I suppose. But that's inevitable and is why I wish, I wish I could fast-forward 3 months or so when everything and everyone is more familiar. Not that I want them to be my friends, at least I don't expect that to happen.
Some other random realisations in no particular order:-
More thoughts from the frontline to follow.
Some other random realisations in no particular order:-
- As a Solicitor and mother/woman in her forties, I am no longer part of the 'young' crowd at work;
- Staff Christmas parties are therefore to be endured rather than enjoyed;
- My age shows in my degree of sartorial formality;
- I may have fussed a bit too much about the clothes before I started;
- Apart from the gnawing insecurity, (whisper it) I think I am enjoying the challenge;
- Marks & Spencer, Moorgate is offering joints of Lamb & Beef half-price (and BM loves a bargain)
- I need a cleaner/wife
More thoughts from the frontline to follow.
Thursday, 16 December 2010
Just visiting
So I am nearly at the end of my first 2 weeks of full-time employment in 6 years but more of that another time. No, what I would like to share with you now is one of the downsides I suppose of occupying any house which is over 150 years old.
I should begin by saying that I am something of a creature of habit. I like tea first thing before anything else, coffee later on. I like being first one up in the morning and I especially like being alone in the kitchen with the radio on, in that short time space before the children wake up.
Over the past 12 days or so of adjusting to employment again, I have used these precious minutes to take stock, plan (as much as possible) my day ahead and enjoy the peace. Until today...
You see we now have some new, rather famous neighbours (yes, even more famous than Lionel!) and they have set about re-plastering and goodness knows what else to the house. Not a problem you might think since the workmen don't arrive before 8am. But they are not the problem, in fact I'm delighted that they are having the work done.
No, it's something else. We are semi-attached and I suspect share common underfloor spaces and possibly also roof spaces although I can't be sure of that since I have never been up in the loft. Not to put too fine a point on it: Mr (and I suspect Mrs and the children) Mouse have packed their bags and moved into ours. We met this morning shortly after I switched on the lights in the kitchen. They seemed to have been having some sort of meeting in the middle of the kitchen floor - no doubt concerning their new accommodation.
Having spent a not inconsiderable sum over the years on pest eradication, I am gloomy about the prospects of shared co-habitation. It won't work because I now know too much about their hygiene habits, reproduction etc. But the memory of the smell of decomposing mouse/several probably, under our floorboards is also still fresh. If we call in the experts again, the Mouse family will simply head on back next door for a while I suppose.
I suspect I may have to broach the subject of a joint instruction (with new famous people). It's not what I had in mind when I pictured our conversations over Christmas drinks.
I should begin by saying that I am something of a creature of habit. I like tea first thing before anything else, coffee later on. I like being first one up in the morning and I especially like being alone in the kitchen with the radio on, in that short time space before the children wake up.
Over the past 12 days or so of adjusting to employment again, I have used these precious minutes to take stock, plan (as much as possible) my day ahead and enjoy the peace. Until today...
You see we now have some new, rather famous neighbours (yes, even more famous than Lionel!) and they have set about re-plastering and goodness knows what else to the house. Not a problem you might think since the workmen don't arrive before 8am. But they are not the problem, in fact I'm delighted that they are having the work done.
No, it's something else. We are semi-attached and I suspect share common underfloor spaces and possibly also roof spaces although I can't be sure of that since I have never been up in the loft. Not to put too fine a point on it: Mr (and I suspect Mrs and the children) Mouse have packed their bags and moved into ours. We met this morning shortly after I switched on the lights in the kitchen. They seemed to have been having some sort of meeting in the middle of the kitchen floor - no doubt concerning their new accommodation.
Having spent a not inconsiderable sum over the years on pest eradication, I am gloomy about the prospects of shared co-habitation. It won't work because I now know too much about their hygiene habits, reproduction etc. But the memory of the smell of decomposing mouse/several probably, under our floorboards is also still fresh. If we call in the experts again, the Mouse family will simply head on back next door for a while I suppose.
I suspect I may have to broach the subject of a joint instruction (with new famous people). It's not what I had in mind when I pictured our conversations over Christmas drinks.
Monday, 25 October 2010
Work
I dipped in and out of the coverage of the Pope's visit to Britain last month but one thing which stuck in my mind was a speech given by the Archbishop of Canterbury at a joint service at Westminster Abbey. The Pope spoke too of course but what I remember most are these words spoken by the Archbishop:-
'Work is so often an anxious and obsessive matter, as if our whole value as human beings depended upon it; and so, consequently, unemployment, still a scourge and a threat in these uncertain financial times, comes to seem like a loss of dignity and meaning in life.
'We live in an age where there is a desperate need to recover the sense of the dignity of both labour and leisure and the necessity of a silent openness to God that allows our true character to grow and flourish by participating in an eternal love.'
I thought it one of the most profound and beautiful statements I have heard about the nature of humanity and human dignity in a long time. I found myself thinking about those words quite a bit over the intervening weeks because the truth is that we do identify ourselves in terms of what we 'do'. I remember that when I first arrived in London in 1987, being struck by how almost the first question people would ask about you was "and what do you do?" and one sensed very quickly that this is how your value as a person was judged. Where I came from, it was considered bad manners to ask such a thing and even worse to volunteer the information. In many ways, although they would have dismissed such a suggestion as nonsense, that level of civility was the essence of what we might now consider to be 'cool'.
What I've been pondering is I suppose what Dr Williams was saying which is, if our whole identity is tied up in our work, what or who are we when that unexpectedly disappears? And what happens if that event ie unemployment is repeated on a mass scale ?
Maybe the scale of the measures announced last week as they become clear over the next few years and the consequent effect on the public services will mean that for instance the unpaid work done by the many volunteers up and down the country will be valued more, rather than ignored or worse, simply taken for granted .
I'm not done with this yet...
'Work is so often an anxious and obsessive matter, as if our whole value as human beings depended upon it; and so, consequently, unemployment, still a scourge and a threat in these uncertain financial times, comes to seem like a loss of dignity and meaning in life.
'We live in an age where there is a desperate need to recover the sense of the dignity of both labour and leisure and the necessity of a silent openness to God that allows our true character to grow and flourish by participating in an eternal love.'
I thought it one of the most profound and beautiful statements I have heard about the nature of humanity and human dignity in a long time. I found myself thinking about those words quite a bit over the intervening weeks because the truth is that we do identify ourselves in terms of what we 'do'. I remember that when I first arrived in London in 1987, being struck by how almost the first question people would ask about you was "and what do you do?" and one sensed very quickly that this is how your value as a person was judged. Where I came from, it was considered bad manners to ask such a thing and even worse to volunteer the information. In many ways, although they would have dismissed such a suggestion as nonsense, that level of civility was the essence of what we might now consider to be 'cool'.
What I've been pondering is I suppose what Dr Williams was saying which is, if our whole identity is tied up in our work, what or who are we when that unexpectedly disappears? And what happens if that event ie unemployment is repeated on a mass scale ?
Maybe the scale of the measures announced last week as they become clear over the next few years and the consequent effect on the public services will mean that for instance the unpaid work done by the many volunteers up and down the country will be valued more, rather than ignored or worse, simply taken for granted .
I'm not done with this yet...
Back in the game
A lot has happened over the past 10 days or so, perhaps the most significant development being my return to full-time employment...well, the certainty of it at any rate. For now, I can plan the last few weeks of this life whilst preparing for something entirely different.
Although I have had serious crises of confidence about my ability to return to the fray/pitch (oops, losing the game metaphor now) I have nevertheless managed to persuade some very nice people in the City that I've still got it and what's more, they need me. So phase 2, and my favourite part, will involve kit and more specifically, acquiring it. A very good and wise friend of mine maintains that getting the kit right is more than half the battle, since it will not only give you confidence but also instill confidence in others.
So that's the fun part. The trickier issues will involve childcare, managing my voluntary commitments, some of which inevitably will have to go and I suppose ultimately it means altering the nature of my relationships including friendships. It will be a process of change for all of us but I can honestly say that I am excited at the prospect.
For now though, I'm going to focus on phase 2 as above and get shopping.
Although I have had serious crises of confidence about my ability to return to the fray/pitch (oops, losing the game metaphor now) I have nevertheless managed to persuade some very nice people in the City that I've still got it and what's more, they need me. So phase 2, and my favourite part, will involve kit and more specifically, acquiring it. A very good and wise friend of mine maintains that getting the kit right is more than half the battle, since it will not only give you confidence but also instill confidence in others.
So that's the fun part. The trickier issues will involve childcare, managing my voluntary commitments, some of which inevitably will have to go and I suppose ultimately it means altering the nature of my relationships including friendships. It will be a process of change for all of us but I can honestly say that I am excited at the prospect.
For now though, I'm going to focus on phase 2 as above and get shopping.
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